News of the Weird

[derickw]

If you think Dylan\'s auction amounts to prostitution, she completely agrees. She also said she\'s not breaking any laws -- after all, prostitution in Nevada is legal.

and Rhode Island. the only two states in the US where prostitution is legal.

and on a side note. when i was younger i chose NOT to have sex with virgins......

[peaches626]

Well, I know I ain\'t toppin 3.8 mil.


I prefer to learn something from an experienced woman anyway.

[FrankZappa]

Cable provider apologizes for porn interruption

      TUCSON, Ariz. (AP) - A cable television provider has apologized to Tucson-area customers over a 30-second porn interruption during the Super Bowl. Philadelphia-based Comcast issued a brief statement Monday saying the company is "mortified" and is conducting a thorough investigation. Comcast spokeswoman Jennifer Khoury says the initial investigation suggests that the interruption was an "isolated, malicious act."
      The company says only customers in the Tucson area receiving the standard definition feed - not high definition - were affected. Tucson media outlets reported that they received calls from irate viewers about the porn, which aired just after the Arizona Cardinals\' Larry Fitzgerald scored on a long touchdown reception during the game\'s final minutes.

[tyzack]

COLORADO SPRINGS, Colo. -- Colorado Springs police are looking for a man who hit two 7-Eleven convenience stores early Wednesday, armed with a Klingon sword.

The first robbery was reported at 1:50 a.m., at 145 N Spruce St. The clerk told police a white man in his 20s, wearing a black jacket, blue jeans and wearing a black mask, entered the store with a weapon the clerk recognized from the Star Trek TV series.

The robber demanded money and left with an undisclosed amount.  

A half hour later, police received a call from a 7-Eleven at 2407 N. Union Blvd., where a man matching the previous description entered the store with a similar weapon. He also demanded money from the store clerk. The clerk refused and the robber ran off.

Both clerks described the weapon as a Star Trek Klingon type sword, called a "Batleth."

Neither clerk was injured in the robberies.

[derickw]

"would you guys laugh if i said commander Warfs head looks like a fanny?"

[FreeSpirit]

[wildcoyote]

A 56 year old woman swam the Alantic? No.  
It\'s a hoax.

http://sports.yahoo.com/olympics/beijing/blog/fourth_place_medal/post/The-great-Atlantic-Ocean-swimming-hoax?urn=oly,140525

I got to say- I\'m a fan of a good hoax. Make the media your bitch. We should create one to get tB a little publicity.  Maybe go on Wikipedia and list the Breakfast as an opener for the east coast Phish dates.

[FreeSpirit]

A pet chimpanzee - who had appeared in TV commercials and shows - got loose at a home at 241 Rock Rimmon Road in Stamford, Connecticut Monday afternoon and attacked a woman, according to Stamford police. The woman is in critical condition and it was not his first time the animal has been on the loose.

His owner, Sandra Herold, 70, had called a friend over to help since "Travis" was misbehaving.  He had taken the keys to the car.  The chimp was also trying to open car doors, which he apparently did to indicate he wanted to go for a ride.  Herold was able to coax Travis back to the house and she gave him some Xanax-laced tea, said police.

When the friend, Charla Nash, 55, of Stamford arrived minutes later, the 200-pound chimp bolted outside and began brutally attacking Nash as she was getting out of her car, leaving her with severe facial injuries.  She is in "very critical condition," said police. She remains in critical condition Tuesday.

Travis\' owner tried to stop the attack by stabbing the chimp with a butcher knife.  When that didn\'t work, she called 911, according to police.

When they arrived, officers gave emergency medical personnel an armed escort to the victim.  Police evacuated the area because children were playing nearby.

Travis then charged at police, smashed a car window and opened the door to a police cruiser where an officer was taking cover.  That officer shot the chimp several times and Travis ran off.  Police followed a trail of blood through the house and found Travis dead in his living quarters in the back of the house, said police.  He had several gunshot wounds, police said.

This was not Travis\'s first run-in with the law.

On Oct. 19, 2003, Travis escaped from his owner\'s SUV and went running through the streets.  More than a dozen police officers chased around after him at the time.

In a newspaper article at the time, police said the chimp, then 10, was toilet trained.  He reportedly dressed himself, ate at the table and drank wine.  He could use a computer and remote control.

He starred in Old Navy and Coca-Cola commercials and even appeared on the Maury Povich Show, according to an article in the Stamford Advocate.

Travis\'s owner, Sandra Herold, 70, is also hospitalized.  She might have had a mild heart attack, people at the scene reported, but Stamford Hospital is not releasing any information about her condition.

[tyzack]

Wow

THIS POST IS MORE THAN FIVE CHARACTERS!

[FrankZappa]

Fake Foreigner drummer allegedly steals Corvette

02/11/2009 5:00 PM, AP


CLEARWATER, Fla. – Authorities said a transient man convinced a woman that he was the drummer for the rock band Foreigner, stole her Corvette and then crashed it. Police said a 48-year-old man befriended the woman at a Tampa hotel, claiming to be Cory James, the drummer for Foreigner.


The band has had more than a half dozen drummers over the years, none of whom were named Cory James.


The two met up later at the Clearwater Hilton, where police said the man conned the valet into giving him the woman\'s 2002 Chevrolet Corvette without her knowledge or consent. He crashed a short time later and ran off, and police say they used a dog to track him down.


The man faces multiple charges, including grand theft auto. He was being held on $27,900 bail.

[bezerker]

Yikes !!

Palm Coast - A Palm Coast couple was arrested Tuesday after a CD showing pictures of a 40-year-old woman having sex with dogs that she adopted from the humane society was turned over to authorities, deputies said.

David Maldonado, 42, and his wife, Carla Maldonado, 40, were arrested on charges of lewd and lascivious battery and contributing to the delinquency of a minor in connection with an incident that occurred four years ago.

Flagler County sheriff\'s investigators said the Flagler County Humane Society, where Carla Maldonado had worked, turned over the compact disc in November. The humane society terminated her employment upon receipt of the CD.

Investigators have stated that the disc also contained 16 photographs of Carla Maldonado engaged in sexual activity with a 15-year-old female who was an acquaintance with the family. David Maldonado photographed the sex acts, according to investigators.

Both Carla and David Maldonado were charged with providing the victim alcohol and encouraging the participation in the sex acts. Sheriff\'s investigators said the victim is now 19 years old.

"This case is still under investigation and additional charges may be filed," Flagler County Sheriff Donald W. Fleming said.

Investigators have seized two computers from the couple\'s Palm Coast home.

The duo was being held in the Flagler County Inmate Facility Wednesday morning. His bond was set at $15,000 and her bond was set at $10,000.

Anyone who thinks they may have been victimized by this couple is urged to contact the Flagler County Sheriff\'s Office.

http://www.tampabays10.com/news/mostpop/story.aspx?storyid=95375&provider=top

[davepeck]

^ it\'s always florida. jesus.

[Spacey]

Sounds pretty hot to me.

If I have learned anything from selling insurance in Florida is that I want nothing to do with Florida. There are so many characters in that state.

[booztravlr]

His bond was set at $15,000 and her bond was set at $10,000.

So, explain to me why his bond was set $5,000 higher than hers. According to the article all he did was take pictures. She was the one sleeping with dogs at the humane society (her place of employment) and also the one who had sex with an underage female.

[Drew_Kingsley]

I\'m curious as to how the husband\'s bail is higher than the woman\'s bail? Just a technicality in the legal system, or is it worse to photograph somebody banging a dog and/or minor than to actually do it?