You know you\'re a Star Wars geek when...
Member of the Internet Link Exchange
1. When you pass out while trying to move a pencil across the desk with the Force.
NicolleSolo (
njones@wade.org)
2. when you get jealous of luke because his light saber is double the size of yours
hggybare (hggybare@aol)
3. You found this page with intentions of locating the Star Wars "greek" club.
ILU
4. You would love to have Frank Oz stick his hand up your ass so you can be as wise as Yoda
Le Poupee
5. When you get into a fight, you automaticly find yourself reaching for a lightsaber...
Jonathan McClendon (
jrmcclen@southern.edu)
6. If you get your head stuck in a bucket pretending your Darth Vader
Mr.
7. When you spend time watching the Star Wars trilogy because you think there will be a test on it later.
No Name Given
8. You punch out trekkies who say "Death star my ass, I\'d like to see those losers take out DS9".
Rallan
9. With a blue-tinted plastic tube, a flashlight, two hours of a saturday night, and 4 rolls of blue electrical tape, you finally complete your own working "Light-saber"
Will Lance (
will-lance@mindspring.com)
10. Your room is filthy except for your "Star Wars Area."
Will Lance (
will-lance@mindspring.com)
11. You put on a luminous coloured condom and walk around humming, pretending you\'re a light-saber
Carl Nicholson (
lhunison@reading.ac.uk)
12. you name your right hand \'Leia\'
Grizz
13. You waste three hours and 8,000 brain cells a day coming up with jokes for this page.
Anneke Skywalker (
youwish@whatever.com)
14. You think you are the life of the party because you imitate Yoda\'s voice and have him say things a Jedi master wouldn\'t say.
John Solo (
smbkjb@ix.netcom.com)
15. Whenever you get in trouble, you mutter "I have a bad feeling about this."
John Solo (
smbkjb@ix.netcom.com)
16. when you listen for Obi-Wan while attempting to parralell park.
Katie Tainsh (
MosEisely1@aol.com)
17. When your father asks you how fast your car is, you reply,"Fast enough for you, old man."
Jedi200
18. When you need to go to the toilet, you say "Intensify Foward firepower, I don\'t want anything to get through"
Mr.Nadon
19. You ram a model X-Wing up someone else\'s asshole and congratulate yourself for finding the only weak spot.
Use the Force (
c_tan1@hotmail.com)
20. Your girlfriend is called "Jabba the Slut."
Eric Behrens (
MADMOOGLE@AOL.COM)
21. you don\'t have any money to buy food or clothes but you have a kick-ass STAR WARS collection.
Steve Forrester
22. You swear you saw Obi-Wan in your Cheerios.
Benny (
Mware@gravis.com)
23. You get caught doing your Darth Vader impression in the bathroom. (what are you doing in there son? *heavy breathing*YOUR POWERS ARE WEAK OLD MAN!!!!)
Gavin Burbidge (
jarvis@spectranet.ca)
24. when you wake up screaming, "Luke it\'s a trap!"
Leia Oragana-Solo (
leiaorgana_solo@hotmail.com)
25. You know you\'re a Star Wars geek when you unsuccessfully get the last cheerio in the bowl and instinctively mutter, "The Force is strong in this one."
Mr.Chickenshit
26. You start to see visions of Ben Kenobi telling you to go to bed.
BRANDON BUCKNOR (
BAI@CFT.NET)
27. When you spend eight hours at the library printing this crap out over and over...
Jaina Solo
28. when your girlfriend says you have a small dick and you say "You underestimate the power of the force."
SuperStar (
moir_w@common.net)
29. You Find yourself Getting Beaten up for saying everyone\'s lines 2 seconds before they do in the theatre.
Chris Bishop (
FettSlaveI@aol.com)
30. When... Your first sentence was "I have a bad feeling about this."
Kh\'lysto
31. When you find yourself quoting the opening lines of "A New Hope".....and don\'t stop until 125 minutes later.
Tenel Ka
32. You curse out people that go,"Yeah! I know who Obi-Wan Kenobi is! Isn\'t he that guy with the funky ears that goes,"Live Long and Prosper?"
Laura
33. You punch out people that say,"But I thought Han Solo flew the Enterprise?"
Laura
34. You can\'t resist to hum when you turn on a flashlight
Tionne Solo (
porip@hotmail.com)
35. Before sex, you look at your penis and say "Get in there, you furry oaf, I don\'t care what you smell!"
None Given
36. You\'re a Star Wars geek when your teacher hands you your test back and says "commas are your weakness." You shoot back: "And your faith in your friends is yours!"
Myles The Cat (104204,3150@compuserve.com)
37. When someone talks about people getting abducted by little green men you say, "Yoda would never do such a thing!"
Jedi Master Yoda (
wilson@fastlink.com.au)
38. you actually feel the need to attack Star Wars geeks with a camera to prove that you are not of their kind.
Angus Campbell (
AngusCmpbl@aol.com)
39. after looking at your tiny dick you remember yoda\'s saying "size matters not."
No Name (
retder@aol.com)
40. when, you\'re drunker than you\'ve ever been in your life and still know that the possibilitiy of successfully navigating an asteroid field is 3,720 to one.
Jill Mattarochia (
jmm337@psu.edu)
41. You buy 2 copies of the trilogy just so you could have the full Darth Vader Helmet.
David (
lidohan@hotmail.com)
42. You\'ve wached the trilogy more times than mark hammil.
Mr. fett
43. When you heard of Titanic getting more money than Star Wars, you immediately reached for your home-made lightsaber and started a hunt for James Cameron.
ME!
44. You respond to your friends taunting of "HA! HA! Titanic beat Star Wars!" by clenching your teeth and grunting "We\'ll get \'em in the prequels"
Me again!
45. You sabotage the Titanic theatre to play Star Wars: A New Hope when the ship starts to sink.
yep... it\'s me
46. You call in bomb threats every time Titanic starts playing and then start giggling uncontrollably when you watch the people running out.
The one and only me
47. You finnally figure out that ANH rearanged is Han
No Name Given
48. You point out to people that given inflation Star Wars kicked Titanic\'s Ass by nearly 300 million.
EJ
49. When your boss forwards all of your checks to the local Star Wars supplier.
Rob Doran
50. The first thing you think of when you hear the words "hot, wet and horny" is a sweating bantha.
Grand Moff James R. Tarkin
51. During sex, you\'re still rearanging the figures on your shelf.
Jeff Celchu (
simmox@sprintmail.com)
52. you stand up a date to put jokes on this page.
Aminitor
53. You go to star wars conventions with the sole purpose of getting laid.
Aminitor
54. You wake up with a hangover blood on your hands and a ripped t-shirt that says trekkies forever
NickVader
55. You have a tan line from your Darth Vader helment.
WOOKIE GIRL
56. at the airport, when the clerk asks you if anyone else has handled your bag you say,"No, it\'s just me, the boy, two droids...and no questions asked.
No name given
57. When your stuck doing fuckin \'yoga\' classes because of a misprint on the advertisement
The Real Yoda (
brendan_30@hotmail.com)
58. Before sex, you say this may smell bad , kid but it will keep you warm.
THUGOFWAR
gotme123@hotmail.comNEW 59. You know you\'re a Star Wars geek when...you spend hours thinking up the new catchphrase "the prequels are gonna sink Titanic!
Rob (
daltonator@hotmail.com)
NEW 60. A friend gets a kick ass home audio/video center and you tell him, "Don\'t be too proud of this technological terror you\'ve constructed."
David (
dmparson@utmb.edu)
NEW 61. These aren\'t YKYASWGW jokes but they\'re funny (you can send in more if you have any):
a number of things we expect to here samuel l. jackson say in the upcoming star wars prequel:
1. Hand me my lightsaber. It\'s the one that says "Bad Motherfucker."
2.Yeah, Chewie got a hair problem, but what the brother gonna do? He\'s a Wookiee.
3.You\'re sending the FETT? Shee-it Jabba, that\'s all you had to say!
4. Does Jabba look like a bitch?
5. If Obie One ain\'t home, I don\'t know what we\'re gonna do cause I ain\'t got no other connections on Tatooine.
6. You don\'t need to see my goddamn identification, these aren\'t the motherfucking droids you\'re looking for!
7. Hey, Womp rat may taste like pumpkin pie bue I\'d never know cause I\'d never eat the filthy motherfucker.
above from Nicole Beck (
nickels85@juno.com)
NEW 8. What ain\'t no planet I ever heard of. They speak english on What?
~Jedi Kray-Su
NEW 9. I don\'t want to hear about no mother-fucking ifs. All I want to hear from your ass is "You ain\'t got no problems Mace, get back in there, carbon-freeze them motherfuckers and wait for Rogue squadron which should be comming directly."
~Jedi Kray-Su
NEW 10. A Jedi\'s lightsaber...when you absolutely, positively gotta kill every motha fucker in the room...accept no substitute.
No Name Given
NEWER 11. A Star Wars variation on the opening scene of Pulp Fiction. It\'s too long to put up here so CLICK HERE if you want to read it. It\'s some funny shit.
Colin Weaver (
colinweaver44@hotmail.com)
NEWER 12. We should have two-jeweled light sabers for this kind of deal.
Colin Weaver (
colinweaver44@hotmail.com)