GAME TIME
This year, President Obama\'s State of the Union address is scheduled for Tuesday, January 24, 2012 at 9pm (Eastern). It should be broadcast on all major networks and cable news/political netorks. For online coverage, go to
http://www.c-span.org/executive/stateoftheunion.asp.
EVENT
# of Drinks
Every time he says....
General Blather "The state of our union is strong" (or some version of this)
1
hope
1 wishful shot
change
1
"hopeful audacity of yes we can change"
sip of unicorn wine
progress
1
"let me be clear"
1
"make no mistake"
1
rhetoric or civility
smile falsely while taking a shot
Foreign Policy Iraq
swig one last shot for the road
Afghanistan
1
Iran
<yawn> 1
China or North Korea or Cuba
shot of something red
Syria
1 repressive shot
Osama bin Laden
fist pump, then 1
Arab Spring
1 of arak
Greece
ouzo
Europe
1
Euro
2
Eurozone
3
Eurotrash
4 (+1 if you self-identify)
Domestic Policy debt
borrow a shot from a friend, promise you\'ll really pay it back this time
deficit
finish your drink; borrow the drink of the person next to you and drink it too
investment
(in reference to government spending)
1
investment
(in reference to individual discretionary financial decisions)
hide your shot under your bed; drink it the next time the Dow drops 100 points
unemployment
1
jobs
1
+1 if you\'ve been unemployed in the last year
+2 if you\'re unemployed today (we\'ve been there)
Wall Street
1 hoity toity shot
Main Street
PBR gulp
Keystone Pipeline
1 Keystone
Shared sacrifice
1
recovery <chuckle>
small 1
health care
1 medicinal shot
"Race to the Top"
1, but you\'ll be tested on it later
Occupy Wall Street
1 of something cheap, but then get up and move to a different seat
The One Percent
1 haughty shot of something expensive (if you can\'t afford something expensive, see "Occupy Wall Street")
"country ahead of party"
2
Steve Jobs
iShot
Warren Buffett
filthy rich shot
"Don\'t mess with Texas!" (Sure it\'s a non-sequitur, but why break tradition?)
Exchange confused glances, drink freely
Every time he.... refers to a tax increase as "asking" some to pay more
2
talks about American "competitiveness" in reference to jobs
1
adds a color qualifier to jobs (e.g., green jobs or blue collar jobs)
1 drink of the same color
praises recent economic figures but announces that he is not "satisfied"
1
references streamlining or reducing unnecessary regulation
streamline the contents of your glass into your mouth
uses an anecdote to defend a policy
1 for health care reform
2 for anything else
sets a long-term objective or vision to be met after his current term is up
shot of what you\'d like to be drinking in 2022 and beyond
Every time the camera shows.... the First Lady
1
the First Lady\'s arms
1, delivered by bicep curl
Joe Biden, and he looks like he wants to interrupt the speech
1
your congressional representative
1
and pat yourself on the back for being able to identify your representative
a close-up on Speaker John Boehner
1
+1 if he\'s crying
best if drinking the most bronzed or orange beverage available
a "special guest" who is introduced by the President
1
a "special guest" who is a member of the armed forces
1
a standing ovation from HALF of Congress
1
Other if the speech is under an hour
Finish your drink and have another beer
REPUBLICAN RESPONSE BONUS GAME socialism/ist; communism/ist
1 shot of something red, drunk with your left hand
wasteful spending
1
i play this most years and it is POTENT!!
things i have found that help -
turning on the closed captioning so you don\'t miss anything
taking tomorrow off